I got a lovely surprise today from a writer / blogger I’ve come to adore. @ht_honey caught my attention last year when she was lovely enough to let me use two of her Sinful Sunday photos as inspiration for two separate stories (The Second Letter and Drive), and her blog, Happy Come Lucky, continues to engage and inspire me, even more now than it did when I was first fortunate enough to find it.
Anyway, the lovely surprise I got was that Honey nominated me for a Liebster Award. The conditions of accepting the award are that you answer some questions, offer up some little known facts about yourself and nominate a handful of other bloggers who have less than 1000 followers. You can read the full rules over at Honey’s place, and while you’re there, please do take a look at her answers to Marie Rebelle‘s questions. There’s some great stuff in there!
And now, for My Answers to Honey’s Questions:
1. What three words would you choose to describe your blogging persona?
Curious, introspective and measured.
2. Is there something that you have been scared or nervous to post on your blog, but you have done it anyway? What was it, and how did it work out?
Yes! I get twitchy over any post that has to do with my body. My post, Small Breasts, was a bit nerve-wracking, though less so than my Pussy Pride Post. That said, the posts I’ve done on vulnerability and jealousy have scared me far more, but I’m glad I did them. A lot of people contacted me after, confessing to feel similarly difficult emotions and I love that I was not only able to connect with people over those experiences, but to offer a bit of support too, even if it’s only to say, “hey, you’re not the only one who feels this stuff.”
3. What is your favourite drink for when you are relaxed and enjoying yourself?
Tea! Or bourbon. Or champagne. Always separately though ;)
4. Would you describe yourself as impulsive or a planner? How does your approach to blogging fit in with that?
I’d say I’m impulsive planner. I have a list of topics several pages long and I tend to schedule them out a month ahead, but then there are weeks, like this one with Hollow Places, when something grabs me so I run with the impulse.
5. Which body part fascinates you and why?
The brain. It is absolutely the more underrated erogenous zone. Plus, people fascinate me and I believe that hearts and souls aside, our brains are the seat of our humanity, biologically speaking.
6. Which memes do you take part in?
I just took part in my first memes last week and did a two for one! I did my first Wicked Wednesday and Kink of the Week with a post on corsets! I love both memes and am looking forward to participating in those and others more, work allowing. I’m also a really passionate supporter of Sinful Sunday.
7. If a genie offered you three blogging/publishing wishes, what would they be?
I think they can all be summed up in one major wish – to make a living from fiction, blogging, articles and essays. That’s on the practical end of things. On the creative / idealistic side, I want to reach as many people as I can. There’s so much judgement around sex and sexuality. I just want to provide alternative ways of looking at ourselves, our relationships and where we are as a culture.
8. Bath or shower and why?
Shower, unless I’m with someone else. Then it would be shower or bath depending on how much time we had. If I’m on my own though, shower definitely. I’m tall so most standard bathtubs aren’t terribly comfortable, plus I get restless. I’m not great at hanging out and soaking unless there’s conversation or sexy stuff going on.
9. Do you have a life mantra/motto? What is it?
I have two, and they’re actually very similar to yours. The first is Run at what it is you fear. My dad taught me to fight when I got scared, and that impulse has carried forward. While I’m definitely not getting into physical altercations, I’m much more comfortable facing the difficult thing than running from it.
The second is really just two words – Empathy and compassion. They’re more of a reminder to do as little harm as possible. They’re wound up with Know thyself. I find that, the better I understand myself, the better able I am to keep a proper perspective and act with empathy and compassion. It’s an ideal, which means I don’t always make it, but it reminds me to try.
10. What is one of your guilty pleasures?
I don’t have guilty pleasures. I just have pleasures ;)
11. How did you choose the name of your blog?
When I was first putting Erotica. Sex. Culture. together, it was just called Malin James (my pseudonym) with no further subtitle. It didn’t seem like enough, because my name said nothing about my interests or concerns, so I tacked on the subtitle and have been very happy with it since.
Eleven Facts About Me:
Quick confession – I’m lifting the first 7 from a Facebook meme that’s been circulating, but the last 4 are fresh and hot off the press!
1. I went to one of NYU’s acting conservatories and am a classically trained actor. Theater only (sorry film – you never coaxed me away).
2. My favorite roles were in The Seagull (Masha), Twelfth Night (Olivia) and Fool for Love (May). I still have my lines memorized from all three.
3. If I could choose any random talent, it would be singing. Hands down. I would love to be able to sing for the sheer, beautiful joy of it.
4. I have an MA in medieval literature and was in the middle of applying to PhD programs when I realized there just aren’t that many jobs for medievalists in the U.S. so I reconsidered and became a librarian instead.
5. Being a librarian was not as satisfying as being a medievalist, nor was it as satisfying as being a writer is. Being a writer is the most satisfying thing I’ve ever done.
6. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 19. Once I did, I made up for a *lot* of lost time.
7. Hot weather makes me massively cranky. I have opposite of Seasonal Affective Disorder and would be glad to live where it was gray and rainy 9 months out of the year if I could.
8. I’ve been non-monogamous since I was 21, and I realized I was bisexual some time in my teens. Both happened with very little fanfare or stress, possibly a side effect of growing up in San Francisco.
9. I’m atheist and can’t remember ever being anything else despite 12 years of Catholic school. I try not to be a jerk about it though – I think faith in a higher power must be wonderful and quite comforting. I’ve just never had it.
10. I love vintage and boutique lingerie. I can’t afford the stuff, but I love looking at it.
11. I would rather have books more than anything else. My love of lingerie pales in comparison to my love of books. I fucking love them and have fetishized them to the point of having them stacked all over the place in little totem piles. They make me happy.
Paying it Forward:
And now, for my nomination! I’d like to nominate the very intriguing erotica writer, Rachel Woe. She’s fairly new on the scene, but we share pages in this year’s Best Women’s Erotica, and her story, “The Art Teacher”, stood out as one of the strongest in a very strong collection. I think she’s one to watch and I’d love for more people to find her and her work.
There are a lot of other writers I’d love to nominate but many of them have already gotten the nod, so I’m going to keep it to one. As for questions, I loved Honey’s so much that I think I’ll ask the same ones.